12 Comments
Jan 21Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

My favorite part of this whole thing continues to be the personality you're able to inject into Blackpaw and White-eye; sans dialogue. This entry especially had them both showing their strengths and weaknesses. When you said Blackpaw was the tribe mediator, my first thought was "well of course", which is a sign of good foreshadowing. White-eye stalking off during negotiations, only to prove his worth when sensing the terror stalkers, helped bring him to life as well. A continued good show, I eagerly await part 4.

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Jan 20Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

So much action here! I love the primitive perspective, even though it's third person its real caveman style gives it a distinctive voice that's so refreshing. Terror soarer is very impressive, and the surprise ending with the darts OOOH! Well done dude! As usual.

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author

Thank you very much! It's definitely been a fun challenge keeping things to the perspective of the limited knowledge Blackpaw has. Balancing his observant nature with his limited scope of understanding has easily made this one of the most stylistically unique stories I've ever written, and I'm pleased as punch that aspect of it continues to come across well.

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Jan 20Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

Oh, I need to do a total word count.

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author

I took the idea from Josh Tatter. He had his wordcount listed at the bottom of the prologue that was the first part of his entry. Figured it'd be a good idea, makes it nice and easy to keep track of where we are in relation to the requested total.

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I've been doing the total for each, but not as a whole. That is a good idea. Good one today, btw.

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Jan 28Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

And now, there's a third party to this story. The crashed ship's crew, the natives, and now whoever tranquilized all of them and the terror soarer.

I love the interactions, and how you show how the brother's communicate. Very elegant, very expressive. Now, if that woman would just stop screaming.

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author

Aw come on, now, every story like this needs a scream queen! ...okay, not really, but I've got ideas in mind to make her a little more than just the screaming damsel and the object of Blackpaw's desire.

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Jan 27Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

I have no idea if you actually wrote the infamous Juv4eta in your story, but you might remember them from Diablo 2.

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author

I know what you're talking about, those annoying little fuckers from Act 3. They're not exactly what I was basing the tribe off of, but the concept of cannibal pygmy tribes used to be a fairly common pulp adventure and horror trope and they drew from that same well.

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That they didn't do their signature and most terrifying warcry "Brbrbrwhwhwhebuuu!" should've been a dead giveaway :)

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Jan 27Liked by The Man Behind the Screen

Ultimately, it wasn't the terror soarers who the two brothers should've been worrying about, but the liddle Juv4eta with their blowguns! Excellente :D

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