I thought your teaser yesterday was great, and I was right.
Your first chapter opening today is absolutely entrancing. I was riveted to my screen as I read the description of the castles, yes both of them, and then learned about the Riverran woman's Duty.
In one chapter, You gave a great background of the kingdom, the people, and both castles in one chapter.
Katrine seems like a capable young woman who would make a good adventuress.
And the closing of the chapter, now you have me interested in who is inhabiting the lower castle.
To think I somehow expected this to just be a short story, too. I think my subconscious imagination understood how much more there was here than my actively thinking brain did.
I'm also relieved to see that the background information didn't come across as too much. I was a little worried I might've frontloaded the scene setting more heavily than I should've, especially since another friend of mine and I mistakenly did exactly that on joint piece of pulpy Yakuza themed fiction we started work on late last night. I know, I'm a madman, too many writing projects going on all at once lol.
Ultimately, just very pleased this seems to be hitting the right notes!
This is great! I especially enjoyed the way it opens with the Castle in the Clouds (with me thinking that’s the titular castle) and then we learn that there’s another, equally/more mysterious, castle.
What a great start! I really enjoy all the characters, they are very much alive with their own personality. The Mother is quite a piece of work! I enjoy the Father and it is nice that they kind of balance each other out, which serves to make Katrine the way that she is. Can't wait to read more 😁
I was engrossed. The descriptions of the castle, the attire, the girls, and the physical features - everything is explicitly written and well-presented. Great work!
While I, like her, don't know whether this is the right thing for her to do or not, I know I want to read on and find out what the castle is. I must say, every time the castle was mentioned I got intrigued.
I grew up in a house with three sisters and a stay at home mom, so I've had a lot of time to witness how conflicts like this tend to play out. I don't want to say where this is going to go but I will say this much: I'm not interested in portraying a family that fights because they don't love each other or they view each other as lessers.
I thought your teaser yesterday was great, and I was right.
Your first chapter opening today is absolutely entrancing. I was riveted to my screen as I read the description of the castles, yes both of them, and then learned about the Riverran woman's Duty.
In one chapter, You gave a great background of the kingdom, the people, and both castles in one chapter.
Katrine seems like a capable young woman who would make a good adventuress.
And the closing of the chapter, now you have me interested in who is inhabiting the lower castle.
I can't wait to read more.
To think I somehow expected this to just be a short story, too. I think my subconscious imagination understood how much more there was here than my actively thinking brain did.
I'm also relieved to see that the background information didn't come across as too much. I was a little worried I might've frontloaded the scene setting more heavily than I should've, especially since another friend of mine and I mistakenly did exactly that on joint piece of pulpy Yakuza themed fiction we started work on late last night. I know, I'm a madman, too many writing projects going on all at once lol.
Ultimately, just very pleased this seems to be hitting the right notes!
This is great! I especially enjoyed the way it opens with the Castle in the Clouds (with me thinking that’s the titular castle) and then we learn that there’s another, equally/more mysterious, castle.
What a great start! I really enjoy all the characters, they are very much alive with their own personality. The Mother is quite a piece of work! I enjoy the Father and it is nice that they kind of balance each other out, which serves to make Katrine the way that she is. Can't wait to read more 😁
Oh my! I am loving this :D Katrine will be causing some trouble, I assume!
I was engrossed. The descriptions of the castle, the attire, the girls, and the physical features - everything is explicitly written and well-presented. Great work!
Moving on to the next chapter!
Beautiful writing! :)
Thank you very much 🙂
While I, like her, don't know whether this is the right thing for her to do or not, I know I want to read on and find out what the castle is. I must say, every time the castle was mentioned I got intrigued.
I grew up in a house with three sisters and a stay at home mom, so I've had a lot of time to witness how conflicts like this tend to play out. I don't want to say where this is going to go but I will say this much: I'm not interested in portraying a family that fights because they don't love each other or they view each other as lessers.